"Far, Far From Land" by Tim Walker | W December/January 2013-2014.
Wow. Whats with the hate lulz
You guys should prolly stop asking me about him. He’s going to be shocked if he sees his name on my blog. Nasakitan raman ko adto :> hihihi if you have been with me in my third year journey of blogging everything out, you’d know the story. Only time would tell really. Pero that would most likely not happen. Ikaw gyud anon =)
He has become more of the enemy than of my companion, wrecking bridges instead of strengthening it. What is it with him and his pride? Evidently, he values his pride more than he values me. He can’t even make me feel better anymore, even when I’m in my points of insecurity and depression. I remember the very first time I posted about him on my secret blog
Isn’t that ironic. I fell madly in love with him. He was (note, paste tense) exactly what I needed. He handled my insecurities well (handled, past tense), he MADE me feel good about myself. He PUSHED me into doing the right things. He WAS there. He was very expressive and sweet. He DESERVED the best of me. But those days are long gone. The guy I fell in love with turned into pretty much the guy who’d probably be the death of me. I did everything to make him happy, carried our relationship for it not to end. I ignored people who called me “dumb” for resisting your efforts to push me away. For 7 months, I was the guy in our relationship, exerting every effort to keep the relationship in tact. Cried oceans, wasted efforts. Honestly speaking, he’s the first guy I ever, EVER, lowered my pride for. EVER. Unfortunately, he can’t do the same for me. I’m being stupid.
Keep telling myself that it’s not worth it,
I already know I don’t deserve it,
But if it’s for you,
I didn’t mind hurting.
He was my king, while on the contrary, I was just another girl. I don’t know if this will go on, I don’t know whether the plans we made for our future will ever happen. All I know is that right now, I need someone to be here for me, to make me feel love, and I need the guy who once made me feel that. Done chasing you. If you really love me then you would fight and win my heart back, but I guess you value your pride more.